Where was I... Oh I remember, ok so it is night two our second attempt at the same convoy. Thankfully the weather looks good for tonight, and not a cloud in sight. As we roll to the staging area we are all pumped and ready to get out on the road. We arrive in the staging area pull into our lane and instantly sprint to the coolers, cause since we the security element are the black sheep of the platoon, we are left out when it comes to class 1 (the food and drink given out before convoys). So we always rummage through and steal all the drinks in the staging area. After taking well more drinks than we would actually need, we head back to the truck and take up our pre-convoy seat on the front of the mine roller. And just as always we ended up sitting there for way longer than we should have. This time it wasn't cause the weather was bad, a sandstorm, or anything like that. It was because our damn command forgot to get us an interpreter, and we can't go outside the wire without one. Which put us sitting on the mine roller for a good 3 hours, waiting for them to find us a terp. Thank god though we had our old buddy Hillbille being his normal asshole self. Making us all laugh and pointing out all the dumb stuff our command does. Then finally they got us a terp and about 4 hours late we finally rolled out the gate.
And away we went down the road all of about a mile and a half before we get the call to stop because we have a down vic. After learning a little more on the situation we found out that the place were the truck was at was going to be quite a pain in the ass to get to. Which meant we were going to be there for a long time. After being there for about an hour another convoy is coming by us when we begin to hear things hitting the truck. That is when we all know it is happening... they passing truck are throwing glow sticks at us. Just like any Marine would we decide to return fire, and before you know it it is an all out war. Just to let you know on every convoy we roll out with about 2oo glow sticks to mark turns and whatever needs to be marked. But back to the battle so it ends up that every truck that rolled by use ended up throwing about 5 glow sticks at us, needless to say around our truck was glowing after the battle. But the fun didn't end there, at that point in time me and Deelie both jump out of the truck at begin to collect all the glow sticks, we are wondering what to do with them when we think of it. Glow stick art, so we begin to make pictures, everything from different words to huge cocks, and other things, but it seemed like every time we did this another convoy would come past and run over the picture messing it up. Which would mean we would have to jump out again and make another design. Then came the last and final design, Deelie layed on the ground and I made a glow stick chalk line around him in the middle of the road. We did this just hoping that once we got moving again the whole convoy would pass it and crack up. But this would turn out to never happen. We sat in the truck talking about just about everything, when all the sudden Ruby yells at us saying he is seeing something in the thermals. It looks like a person but has a cold heat signature. We don't know what to think about this then he starts screaming that he is seeing more. At this point in time Deelie grabs his rifle and looks out his night vision scope, he screams "they are people wait... there look like there are already dead!" I have no clue what to say when all the sudden Ruby blurts out "ZOMBIES." And just at that moment a hand reaches up and slaps my window, I screamed like a little girl, it was quite embarrassing. But that was not what we were worrying about, I mean come one our truck was being invaded by zombies. Ruby opens fire, just mowing down the now hundreds of zombies coming toward our truck. Deelie jumps out and gets on the tail gate and is dealing out death and destruction to any that get to close. I though am still in the truck screaming like a little girl. At which point Ruby kicks me in the head from the gun and tells me to get it together. I do and slap the truck in drive and it is all over I am swerving left and right taking out any zombie that gets in my way. There is now beginning to be a huge pile of zombies building up, but thankfully the zombies have turned tail and retreated. Ruby fires a last couple bursts in at them as they retreat along with some unkind words. Deelie then springs off the back of the truck and heads straight for the enormous pile of zombies. He whips out his handy Jack Daniels Zippo and sets their remain ablaze. Just to ensure they don't come back to life, but before returning to the truck, he pulls out his pack of Marlboro Reds, take a cigarette from the pack and using the flame from the pile of zombies lights it while saying "Don't ever mess with Scout 1!"
We then got back in the truck and headed back for the road, at which point in time over the radio we hear lets roll so we head another 50 feet down the road, and here stop there is another truck down. But before we could ever get pissed off they tell us to turn around we are going to try it again tomorrow night.
So the next day we get ready and start it all over again but thins time we actually did leave the base and make it to the other base with no problems. Even the trip back was easy, we had nothing happen to us at all. If we could have just ignored the first two days it would have been a great convoy. Actually I shouldn't say that nothing bad happened, cause actually Nick did have something bad happen to him.
Their he was just chillen in his turret in trail 1, when he hears Kim from inside the truck telling everyone to not look back she is peeing. But of course he is in the gun and not worrying about it at all. A little time goes by he is still just chillen up there doing his thing. Then Kim screams up and asks him to throw something out for him. Not telling him what it is he unknowingly takes hold of an open bottle of her piss. And before he can chunk it out of the truck........ the truck hits a big bump and there it goes. There is piss all over his hand and lower arm. I myself along with many other people found this extremely funny when he told us. But unfortunately for him he didn't think it was as funny. So from the bottom of my heart I am sorry Nick.
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